2. Is wisdom acquired by a simple decision or through a coordinated process? and
3. How can we grow in wisdom if this is our desire?
If we would like to gain greater wisdom so we can live more effectively and enhance our quality of life then how precisely would we go about accomplishing this? One effective strategy is the Triangle of Wisdom which is a simple yet effective way of testing and observing the choices we make to determine which of these choices actually improves the quality of our life and which don’t.
I had the belief that gaining the approval of others was the way to feel connected with them. To test this belief I intentionally adjusted my behavior to align with what I thought others wanted from me. Then I observed the results. Externally people did respond positively to my performance but internally I felt like a fraud. Even though I got the approval I was seeking I wasn’t able to enjoy it because I knew that I was wearing a mask and showing people only what I thought they wanted to see. When I reflected on this behavior I realized that pretending to be someone I’m not wasn’t going to bring me the genuine connection I was yearning for because until I was willing to be authentic the only thing people would be able to connect with was the illusion I created therefore any positive attention I received was meaningless. I realized that the only way to get the connection I was seeking was to be as genuine as possible. Even though this might mean that some people would reject me it also meant that those people who accepted me accepted me for who I truly am. Their acceptance provided the authentic connection I was seeking and I was able to experience this connection in the core of my being which is what I was yearning for all along.
Wisdom is not an event it’s a process. That is why it takes time and effort to acquire it. The triangle process of acting, observing, and reflecting is one way to gain a deep understanding of our choices and one path to acquiring true wisdom.